Today is my anniversary. Not my wedding anniversary but the anniversary of it becoming official that I can't have children. I'm not one to dwell on dates of bad events. That was my Grandmother's job. We'd be sitting having a perfectly nice dinner and she'd suddenly announce that today was the 54th anniversary of her Mother's second amputation. Statements like that tend to kill dinner conversation...and appetites. I only remember this day because it's my brother's David's birthday and 8 years ago I ruined it. I went to a doctor's appointment that morning and two hours later I was in surgery. I had been telling the doctor I was in pain but it had gotten unbearable that week. There was discussion going into surgery about the possibility of a full hysterectomy. Sam felt I couldn't live with that. I told him given the choice between surgery or death...I'd take surgery. So it turned out I had a cyst the size of a softball that was leaking fluid into my fallopian tube and distending it. By the way that's a lot more painful than it sounds! The removed one ovary, both fallopian tubes, and all hope of ever conceiving naturally. So it was over...and I ruined his birthday...and he never lets me forget it.
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